In most circumstances, the answer may seem obvious: if I don’t have problems in my relationship, then I automatically have a healthy one. However, this is not always accurate.
In fact, when a person leaves a so-called toxic relationship, many are satisfied with peaceful coexistence with their new partner. To do so, they even end up holding on to phrases that justify the expected lack of happiness, such as “at least we’re getting along” or “I feel valued”, for example. But is this enough to say that your relationship is healthy?
While we believe that there is no exhaustive list to define a healthy relationship, there are some basic factors that we can take into account. In this article, we’ve put together 7 signs that you are most likely in a healthy relationship.
1) You are Happy on Your Own
It is natural that when one is in a relationship the goal is to be happy as a couple. However, one cannot put one’s own happiness in the hands of the other partner. When one does not value oneself, depends on or puts the blame on the other, the relationship becomes unbalanced, which causes one to end up carrying most of the weight of the relationship. Each one needs to value themselves and know how to walk on their own legs.
2) There’s a Sense of Self-Love and Self-Care
This is a very important point. It is essential that each member of a couple feels that they can be happy independent of the other. When there is self-love and self-care, the possibility of both being happy together is much greater.
In the same way, it is important to take care of social relationships, family, and the other own tastes. In other words, both identities have to be maintained, regardless of each other’s personality.
3) Communication is Key
Active listening and empathy are fundamental traits for a healthy relationship. It is important to understand the other person’s point of view, even in situations where you disagree. Flexibility and tolerance are also points that help when making decisions, besides creating a greater feeling of partnership in the couple.
4) Being Sincere Yet Assertive
In many occasions, the fact of being together makes both partners believe that they know each other well, that they know what the other half is thinking in certain situations. This, by the way, is one of the biggest mistakes in a relationship.
Nobody can believe that they fully understand the other’s way of thinking, acting, or having an opinion. If something bothers you, the best thing to do is to tell your partner, instead of expecting the other to guess. And when you do, you need to be honest and defend your own opinion, without harming or belittling the other person’s point of view.
5) Trust is Vital
It is impossible to have a healthy relationship if one partner does not trust the other. Confidence is one of the best signs of balance in the relationship, and jealousy is something natural that can happen from time to time. However, it is necessary to act rationally and, in case of struggles or misunderstanding, talk to clarify the situation.
6) Live in the Present
There is no point in living a relationship centered on past mistakes. If there have been mistakes and the couple has decided to move on, it is important that the issue stops being part of the present days. If this is not possible, it may be a sign that trust has not been regained, just as the mistake has not been forgiven.
7) Being Together Because You want to
Both spouses need to value the relationship and stick with it because they want to, not because they need to. In other words, a healthy coexistence is one that does not imply co-dependence, and that the “being together” is for pleasure. A human needs to be complete regardless of whether he or she is with someone else or not.
You are now aware of the signs to look for to know if you are in a healthy relationship. But on a general note, a healthy relationship is built on a daily basis with dialogue and clarity. Not only about happiness, but also about knowing how to fight and make peace. Do you know any other factor that would help in defining a healthy relationship? We would love to read from you; so leave a comment below!