So, how to know if it’s time to untie the knot and go separate ways? How can you tell if your relationship is right for you? Do you feel insecure in your relationship? Most of us know that a lack of self-confidence can poison our closest relationships. To avoid this toxicity, you can strengthen your couple by asking yourself some simple questions about how you and your partner communicate. Let’s take a look at them.
Do You Still Trust Each Other?
No relationship can survive without trust. If you don’t doubt each other, it shows that you are open and honest with each other about your feelings, problems, and desires.
Do You Share the Same Goals?
Everyone has goals in life, and they can change over time, but do you and your partner still agree on basic moral values and goals? If so, it shows that you both want the same things in life and wants to achieve them together.
Do You Guys Don’t Talk Anymore?
It seems obvious, but as Charlie Puth sang it, do you still talk to each other or look at your smartphone during dinner? If you can have a meaningful conversation over dinner without getting bored, you’re on the right track. Couples are together for many reasons, and one of them is to talk about what’s important to you. The fact that you can talk and laugh together at the table shows that you still care about each other.
Are You Still Laughing Together?
If so, that’s probably still a good solution for you. Laughing together is a sign of closeness; even if you’re laughing at a silly cat video, it shows that you can both enjoy each other’s company even without sex.
Do You Support and Encourage Each Other?
Sometimes we want to start something new, like a business or a hobby, but we’re scared or unsure. If your partner supports you in these things and stands behind your decisions, you still have each other’s back. Encouraging and helping each other is a sign of commitment and shows that you don’t always just care about each other. Relationships are about what you both want.
Do You Have Healthy “Me-Time”?
Relationships bring us closer together, but it’s essential to spend some quality “me-time”. If you can go your separate ways and pursue your own interests or hobbies and then get together again, it shows that your partner trusts and supports you.
Do You Both Have Realistic Expectations of Each Other?
If you feel your partner needs validation, you may have a problem. Don’t expect your partner always to be perfect and realise that he or she has as many flaws as you do. That way, you don’t have to worry about them not meeting your expectations.
Do You Still Encourage Each Other In Public?
Disagreements are part of a relationship, but it’s a sign of trouble if you disagree with your partner in front of other people. Remember that you are both up against the world, and you need to support each other. If you have a problem, take your partner aside and talk to him or her calmly. If you both seem to understand each other, you are on the same wavelength and will get along.
Are You Still a Team?
Do you still do everyday things together, like getting the kids ready for school, folding the laundry, or taking out the trash? If you still see yourselves as a great team, care about each other and help each other, you have a good relationship. When you see each other as a team, neither of you will get angry at the other for taking care of things they shouldn’t.
Are You Honest and Open With Each Other?
If you answered “NO,” you have a big problem. People in long-term relationships talk openly with their partners about embarrassing, humiliating or upsetting things in their lives. They talk together because they think they won’t hurt each other. Without trust and openness, they are no longer friends, let alone in a serious relationship. If it’s difficult, don’t be ashamed to open up and tell your partner.
Do You Discuss Like Mature Adults or Argue on Every Single Thing?
Even if you don’t completely agree on a controversial issue, you should be able to discuss your views without shouting, swearing or behaving rudely. If you are outraged but can discuss the issue calmly, it shows that you respect and value your partner’s opinion. Negotiating also indicates that you can work towards a mutually acceptable solution. In a long-term relationship, compromise is most important.
If you have answered yes to these questions, your relationship is pretty stable. Support, kindness, empathy and encouragement create a good and loving relationship. There is simply no place for put-downs, rudeness, insults, jealousy, belittling, blaming, accusations, judgements, criticism or even physical aggression, especially if the recipient is your partner. These boundaries must not be crossed. “If your relationship with your partner is safe, supportive, and loving, your relationship will be good and healthy.