Now that you have put an end to the toxic relationship, it’s time to take some steps toward reclaiming yourself and restoring your self-confidence, self-esteem, the pursuit of self-growth and the sense of self-worth that belongs to you. Below are points of advice to begin your recovery and healing from the damage rendered by your toxic relationship.
What is a Toxic Relationship?
Toxic relationships are those that leave you feeling emotionally drained and spent. It is difficult to recover from a toxic relationship as the actions and words of the toxic partner impact your self-worth and confidence. Emotional and often physical abuse damages one’s perception of themselves.
Moving on from a toxic relationship requires consciously processing the past and finding out how to heal from a toxic marriage or relationship. Initially, these things may seem hard to implement, but you will slowly find ways to follow these with ease.
1. Re-create your identity
You have to accept that you are no longer in a relationship, meaning you are free from the toxic partner. You have to re-introduce your new self to the people who care about you and those you think need to know who the new you is. In other words, re-introduce yourself to all those who make up who you are as an individual.
2. No contact
Change is not instant; it is a gradual process. It is so tempting, but do not call, text, email that person no matter what. Nothing! Unfriend the toxic person on Facebook, block their Twitter feed and resist the urge to look them up on Instagram.
If you really want to recover from a toxic relationship, you need to stop any form of communication with your ex. Stop texting, delete all contacts from your phone, stay away from the places where they usually spend time.
3. A full detox
Toxic relationships infect and contaminate. To recover from a toxic relationship, be sure to get rid of toxicity and the negative energy unhealthy relationship causes. Engage in some type of movement or mental activity to cleanse and renew yourself after leaving the toxic relationship.
Examples of activities to cleanse your mind and emotions include yoga, tai chi, aerobic exercise, meditation, journaling, talk therapy, or religious practices within a supportive faith community.
4. Make confidence-boosting decisions
The major reason a toxic partner belittles or counts you as nothing is because he/they feel you cannot survive without them. Broaden your scope of knowledge about things you avoided doing because you were too timid and scared. Set goals and objectives to tackle and complete small tasks, followed by more significant tasks to create a feeling of accomplishing something on your own without depending on anyone.
You are responsible for whatever needs fixing and replacement in your life, your financial debts, your career, taking care of your body and so on. You will feel much better and have more confidence in yourself once you start doing things independently.
5. Be around people with positive energy
It is known that negativity and drama are a feature of a toxic person. When you are healing after a toxic relationship, it is imperative to fill the void you’re feeling with people who will have a bright, positive presence in your life.
You will probably crave attention in this period, so feel free to tell that to your friends. Call them, text them, spend more time with them. If you have a single friend, too, it would be perfect. Go out together and tell them to keep your phone away from you. And most importantly, have fun, joke, laugh, as it is the best medicine in the world.
6. Be your own best friend
The primary reason people stay in unhealthy and toxic relationships is that they are scared of being lonely. They cannot be alone because they have not developed a best friend relationship with themselves. If you want to recover from a toxic relationship fully, try to reach a point where you can enjoy your own company. And if that doesn’t help, know that being alone is healthier and preferable to being in an unhealthy toxic relationship filled with lies and negativity.
7. Give love a chance once more
Because you have had a relationship with a toxic partner does not mean there is no Mr. or Ms. Right for you. You should not dwell on past experiences but instead move on. There are a billion people out there and one of them could be the right person for you.
Of course, you should have alone time, but you should keep an open mind when you feel ready to see and date other people.
8. Make a plan for the future
Maybe now is not the moment to move on, but slowly thinking about what you could be doing in the next six months can make you excited about the future. It will help you keep in mind that there is life after this challenging phase.
Also, always remember that you want to feel better and take a step forward; you do not want to be back with your ex again. Before you know it, you will feel like a stronger, happier, wiser version of yourself and everything will become possible again; just hang in there.
9. Let yourself feel everything and vent
Positive and negative feelings exist for a reason and have an important function in our lives. They help us distinguish right from wrong. So, shutting down your emotions makes you completely blind to realize what is good for you and what is not.
If you allow yourself to feel the pain this relationship has caused truly, you’ll be less likely to repeat the same mistake. Write a diary, cry, watch a sad movie, write songs, whatever you need to get in touch with your emotions and get them out of your system.
10. Forget closure
You may find yourself yearning for some form of closure from toxic, manipulative relationships, but that is a vicious cycle that you don’t want yourself involved in. The relationship’s toxicity will seep back into your life if you try to find ways to keep going back to your past.
There is often no closure for situations where a partner was mentally or physically abusive towards you. No apology, explanation, or actions will erase the abuse you’ve experienced. Searching for closure may lead you back into a relationship with your toxic ex, with a false sense of hope or denial. So, don’t rely on the closure to start your healing process.
Final thoughts
Identify a toxic relationship and try to get out of it at the earliest, as it has the potential to ruin your confidence, happiness and self-esteem. Take the steps mentioned here to heal from the toxicity that an unhealthy relationship leaves you with while remaining patient throughout.